you can always count on mom

i come from a long line of okies. we're hardy plains folk. my forbears were always too busy making sure locusts didn't eat everything they owned and choking on dust to have existential crises, much less cash in on them to the tune of millions of dollars.

my mom went to see eat pray love (2010) this week and she sums it up better than i ever could.

"i can't get with that 'finding yourself' bullshit. now, the finding food, james franco and javier bardem part, i'm totally down with."

elizabeth gilbert's net worth is approximately 25 million dollars. if there were any justice in this world my mother's would be at least double that and this is what we would all be going to see instead...